"We seem to find comfort in categories and peace in placement. The world moves quickly around us. There are so many variables, and unanswered questions. Who? What? When? And more importantly why? We feel like we constantly need to pick a side and stick with it... whether it be politically, socially, or artistically. Despite the fact that our outlooks and philosophies are ever changing with each passing day. I have struggled with this often through the years, taking one facet of myself—both personally and creatively—and holding onto it so tightly, until there was nothing but ash in my hand. Who would i be without a definite description? A tangible tag line? The weight of one question can be enough to make a back break."
-taken from 'a single hand' by Her Space Holiday
I'm tired of limiting myself, ignore all my other creative options. I keep putting myself in a box, when all my ideas don't just fit into one category. I'm tired of forcing creativity in on category, and repressing any ideas that come up in other areas. Creativity is fleeting, even though some would disagree that there is a definite science to it. Unless I change something soon, I fear I will be left with nothing.
I'm tired of limitations, and limiting myself because of what I think others think that i can or can't do. Just a thought, inspired by an amazing song/monologue. Her Space Holiday is amazing. Go to their Myspace profile to hear how the above selection ends. Thought provoking. I am intrigued.
Thursday, January 3, 2008
Saturday, December 29, 2007
Approaching 2008
To me there is nothing more comical than seeing a large, black and white great dane on a long red leash dragging three children down the street. The sun breaking through my tiny closet window and waking me with its warm assurance that today is going to be an amazing day. Hearing my childhood friends laugh so uncontrollably hard. Waking up to the smell of my mum making pancakes and mint hot chocolate. Trying to make my cats knock over, or at least climb the Christmas tree. Reading book after book after book on a lazy, rainy day. Watching "summer TV" (the price is right, jeopardy, wheel of fortune) with my grandparents, which they recorded on a video tape...not tivo. Hearing my favourite artist-that-no-one-really-knows-about playing in a public place for the first time. Singing along to anything I please while driving the three hours back to Walla Walla from Portland. Turning up the music really, really, ridiculously loud and cleaning house when I'm home alone. Buying people I love small things that make them really happy. Walking places. Driving in snow, but not ice. Sitting in deep-ish snow, but being perfectly warm and dry at the same time. Doing slightly embarrassing things such as dropping my cell in my drink... and later having a good laugh. Occasional long talks on the phone. The beauty of unlimited text messaging. The smart, witty people in my life. The smell of color when walking into a room with two 6-color presses. Having my nails perfectly painted red. Hearing almost any kind of live music... southern folk rock included. Making dinner and having a few good friends over to eat everything. Escaping big social gatherings without getting caught. Finding a sand dollar completely intact on the beach, the morning after a big storm. Tide pooling. Jumping and playing in the cold, salty waves. Seeing someone blow glass so perfectly. Wi-Fi. Run-ons, and incomplete sentences. A long list of simplicities I can't imagine having not experienced.
Her Space Holiday makes me wish I could write. Anything. 'A Single Hand' speaks volumes. Xoxo, Panda is really great too. Pretty much in love with both of these related groups.
Tree Wave surprised me a little. Its not typically the end result you would expect from a bunch of old video game sounds mixed together. A very raw but refined cacophony of sound that could almost be postal service sounding but in a very different way, and with less vox. Beautifully rustic in an electronic grunge sort of way that just drew me in. Hear 'C64 Data'.
I haven't been searching out music lately, with my computer dying and all. Life has been hard. I have finally condescended to using a PC... we are becoming re-acquainted until Monday when my new computer arrives. Merry Christmas to me! Hope your holidays have been fab and have a happy New Year! I can't believe it's already almost 2008. Crazy life.
Her Space Holiday makes me wish I could write. Anything. 'A Single Hand' speaks volumes. Xoxo, Panda is really great too. Pretty much in love with both of these related groups.
Tree Wave surprised me a little. Its not typically the end result you would expect from a bunch of old video game sounds mixed together. A very raw but refined cacophony of sound that could almost be postal service sounding but in a very different way, and with less vox. Beautifully rustic in an electronic grunge sort of way that just drew me in. Hear 'C64 Data'.
I haven't been searching out music lately, with my computer dying and all. Life has been hard. I have finally condescended to using a PC... we are becoming re-acquainted until Monday when my new computer arrives. Merry Christmas to me! Hope your holidays have been fab and have a happy New Year! I can't believe it's already almost 2008. Crazy life.
Thursday, December 6, 2007
Yellow Converse?
This is the first second I've had time to even think of anything other than school. I'll try to sum up the past month or so of my life. I had several near death experiences—none of them fatal for obvious reasons. I've listened to some good music. I saw band of horses in Seattle during Thanksgiving break. Had a mini reunion with the people I went to Jr. academy with. So strange to see them all.
I am feeling a little lost with my plans for next year. I'm at the point where if I don't take certain classes next quarter, and then I decide to not leave this school, I would really be in trouble as far as trying to graduate from here. It is just really scary to think about the changes that will happen this next year. I will have to leave my home here. I will end up crashing at my mum's house... trying to find a new job, and commuting until I can find someplace to live. It's totally different from what I have experienced the past year. I don't know. I've got no idea where I'll end up. I am scared, but I think it will be really good for me. I'm just in the freak out/reality is hitting me stage... still frightening, nevertheless.
On my playlist this week:
Stars - In Our Bedroom After the War (whole album—each song is so different and good)
Palpitation - 'too soon to give up'
James Figurine - '55566688833' (I love the lyrics)
Tegan and Sara - 'where does the good go' and The Con (whole album)
Sebear - 'cat piano'
Band of Horses - Cease to Begin (am in love with the whole album and can't stop playing it)
Kate Nash - 'merry happy'
Jaymay - 'blue skies'
Headphones - 'i never wanted you'
Wilco - 'what light' and 'on and on and on'
Efterklang - 'mirador' (have stumbled across them several times and it just clicked)
The Radio Dept. - 'always a relief'
The Weepies - 'gotta have you' (best song ever... i have loved it for a while)
I had a dream last night that I received a package in the mail. My friends were at my house when I opened it. There was an iPhone inside, a pair of yellow converse, and some other stuff I can't remember. The package was addressed to "Heather Modern" which is not my name... but usually the post office doesn't mess up that bad, they just mess up addresses... right? I thought I would keep the iPhone, but then I looked at the shoes. They were yellow—a color I like, but can never wear or I look dead, and they were a size 6. Not my size. From that I somehow concluded that it would be wrong for me to keep the iPhone, and that someone would miss it if I kept it... that the package was actually for some other girl named Heather Modern. Strangest dream I've had in a long time. Interpretations? Anyone?
I am feeling a little lost with my plans for next year. I'm at the point where if I don't take certain classes next quarter, and then I decide to not leave this school, I would really be in trouble as far as trying to graduate from here. It is just really scary to think about the changes that will happen this next year. I will have to leave my home here. I will end up crashing at my mum's house... trying to find a new job, and commuting until I can find someplace to live. It's totally different from what I have experienced the past year. I don't know. I've got no idea where I'll end up. I am scared, but I think it will be really good for me. I'm just in the freak out/reality is hitting me stage... still frightening, nevertheless.
On my playlist this week:
Stars - In Our Bedroom After the War (whole album—each song is so different and good)
Palpitation - 'too soon to give up'
James Figurine - '55566688833' (I love the lyrics)
Tegan and Sara - 'where does the good go' and The Con (whole album)
Sebear - 'cat piano'
Band of Horses - Cease to Begin (am in love with the whole album and can't stop playing it)
Kate Nash - 'merry happy'
Jaymay - 'blue skies'
Headphones - 'i never wanted you'
Wilco - 'what light' and 'on and on and on'
Efterklang - 'mirador' (have stumbled across them several times and it just clicked)
The Radio Dept. - 'always a relief'
The Weepies - 'gotta have you' (best song ever... i have loved it for a while)
I had a dream last night that I received a package in the mail. My friends were at my house when I opened it. There was an iPhone inside, a pair of yellow converse, and some other stuff I can't remember. The package was addressed to "Heather Modern" which is not my name... but usually the post office doesn't mess up that bad, they just mess up addresses... right? I thought I would keep the iPhone, but then I looked at the shoes. They were yellow—a color I like, but can never wear or I look dead, and they were a size 6. Not my size. From that I somehow concluded that it would be wrong for me to keep the iPhone, and that someone would miss it if I kept it... that the package was actually for some other girl named Heather Modern. Strangest dream I've had in a long time. Interpretations? Anyone?
Monday, November 5, 2007
Tri-Trip Playlist
It's been a little while hasn't it. November 5, 2007—I'm getting my priorities straight. I've been feeling in a rut for a while now. Not taking time for myself has taken a toll. Realizing this, I have been fighting to get my life back. You know it is sad when people ask how you are, what's new in your life, and all you can respond with is how work is going. Creativity had become almost an impossible feat for me. Realizing this was half of it.
The past week or two I have been trying to get myself on a schedule. Waking up early, taking time for myself, for a relationship with my God, and taking the time to clear my head before each day starts has helped. Going to bed before 11 p.m. has become an important aspect of my new schedule. The days are going by fast, but I feel so much better. I am able to think straight, set my priorities and goals. I am realizing what I need to do, where I need to be.
I am not necessarily happy here at this school, but I'm here for the rest of this year so I am going to make the best of it. After this year I have another 2.5 quarters worth of credits until I could graduate. Even if I were to stay here, I don't think I would have made the connections I need to make to get a semi-successful first job. I am not getting the best education, or even a satisfactory education within my major here. I am really starting to look at transferring to Portland State or UW or someplace cheaper, with slightly better academics, and where I could make connections in a city of my choice. I might have to go to school a bit longer to meet requirements, but I wouldn't be going as deep into debt as if I would if I stayed here. I am school shopping. I work too hard to get such a lack-luster education with not so good grades. Going to a less expensive school would lessen the stress I often feel. I wouldn't have to work quite as hard, and if I did, I could at least start saving some money or paying off loans.
Driving to tri-cities and talking with a good friend about her life really helped me put mine into perspective. I feel so tied down right now—with my senior project, work, and school. Things will be changing. I just need to focus on that. This has been a huge rant. I just wanted you to know what is going on.
In other news, my dad has been having heart problems. This past week has been a little trying on me. I lost it while working on my action script the other day. I really wanted to burn my book! It would have made me pretty happy. Anyways, things with my dad will hopefully be okay. He took a lot of tests this past week, and his heart is clear, not diseased. It is just really weak from long term exposure to high levels of carbon monoxide at his work—which he refuses to leave. I had a really long talk with him the other day. I got a bit frustrated with him. He is a dreamer, which is good, but I am too much of a realist. At some point in the conversation he said that rather than leave his job to get a safer, higher paying job, he wants to become a mountain tour guide, and a ski instructor. He does not ski, and his heart is not strong enough to do the hiking thing. I get really upset when he goes off on these impossible, unrealistic tangents. I really worry about him. I do love him. Please keep him in your prayers.
We made a great playlist for our tri-trip. Here's what I have been stuck on music-wise this past week:
Travis - 'my eyes'
Mario - 'how do i breathe'
The Fratellis - 'chelsea dagger'
Metro Station - 'shake it'
Sigur Ros - 'saeglopur'
Clap Your Hands Say Yeah - 'the skin of my yellow country teeth'
The Feeling - 'love it when you call'
Nelly Furtado - 'promiscuous'
CSS - 'alala' and 'music is my hot hot sex'
Anti-Anti - 'snowden'
New Young Pony Club - 'ice cream'
Telépopmusik - 'breathe' (radio edit)
Radiohead - 'idioteque'
Patrick Wolf - 'the magic position'
Regina Spektor - 'fidelity'
Art Brut - 'bang, bang, rock and roll'
Daft Punk - 'one more time'
The Decemberists - 'summersong'
Bishop Allen - 'rain'
Paper Route - 'are we all forgotten'
Enjoi.
The past week or two I have been trying to get myself on a schedule. Waking up early, taking time for myself, for a relationship with my God, and taking the time to clear my head before each day starts has helped. Going to bed before 11 p.m. has become an important aspect of my new schedule. The days are going by fast, but I feel so much better. I am able to think straight, set my priorities and goals. I am realizing what I need to do, where I need to be.
I am not necessarily happy here at this school, but I'm here for the rest of this year so I am going to make the best of it. After this year I have another 2.5 quarters worth of credits until I could graduate. Even if I were to stay here, I don't think I would have made the connections I need to make to get a semi-successful first job. I am not getting the best education, or even a satisfactory education within my major here. I am really starting to look at transferring to Portland State or UW or someplace cheaper, with slightly better academics, and where I could make connections in a city of my choice. I might have to go to school a bit longer to meet requirements, but I wouldn't be going as deep into debt as if I would if I stayed here. I am school shopping. I work too hard to get such a lack-luster education with not so good grades. Going to a less expensive school would lessen the stress I often feel. I wouldn't have to work quite as hard, and if I did, I could at least start saving some money or paying off loans.
Driving to tri-cities and talking with a good friend about her life really helped me put mine into perspective. I feel so tied down right now—with my senior project, work, and school. Things will be changing. I just need to focus on that. This has been a huge rant. I just wanted you to know what is going on.
In other news, my dad has been having heart problems. This past week has been a little trying on me. I lost it while working on my action script the other day. I really wanted to burn my book! It would have made me pretty happy. Anyways, things with my dad will hopefully be okay. He took a lot of tests this past week, and his heart is clear, not diseased. It is just really weak from long term exposure to high levels of carbon monoxide at his work—which he refuses to leave. I had a really long talk with him the other day. I got a bit frustrated with him. He is a dreamer, which is good, but I am too much of a realist. At some point in the conversation he said that rather than leave his job to get a safer, higher paying job, he wants to become a mountain tour guide, and a ski instructor. He does not ski, and his heart is not strong enough to do the hiking thing. I get really upset when he goes off on these impossible, unrealistic tangents. I really worry about him. I do love him. Please keep him in your prayers.
We made a great playlist for our tri-trip. Here's what I have been stuck on music-wise this past week:
Travis - 'my eyes'
Mario - 'how do i breathe'
The Fratellis - 'chelsea dagger'
Metro Station - 'shake it'
Sigur Ros - 'saeglopur'
Clap Your Hands Say Yeah - 'the skin of my yellow country teeth'
The Feeling - 'love it when you call'
Nelly Furtado - 'promiscuous'
CSS - 'alala' and 'music is my hot hot sex'
Anti-Anti - 'snowden'
New Young Pony Club - 'ice cream'
Telépopmusik - 'breathe' (radio edit)
Radiohead - 'idioteque'
Patrick Wolf - 'the magic position'
Regina Spektor - 'fidelity'
Art Brut - 'bang, bang, rock and roll'
Daft Punk - 'one more time'
The Decemberists - 'summersong'
Bishop Allen - 'rain'
Paper Route - 'are we all forgotten'
Enjoi.
Saturday, October 27, 2007
Hung Up
Hanging up clothes has to be my least favourite part of cleaning my room. I don't enjoy sorting out the "hang up" clothes from my clean laundry, or the tedious act of affixing my clothes to hangers. Putting away shoes comes in at a close second.
It has been a crazy couple of weeks. One way to tell is to look at my room. If there are clothes everywhere, magazines scattered about, and a lot of shoes strewn about, it's a pretty safe bet that the week has been hell. I really need to find a hobby soon. I think I am going to lose my mind if I keep it up. I love what I do for work, but I need a break.
My family really needs prayer right now—my dad is having some serious health problems related to an on the job sort of injury. I'm really worried. Hopefully things will be alright in the end.
Mid-terms are over and I seem to still be passing all my classes nicely. The principles of advertising test didn't rape my too badly. I was really worried after I ended up having 12 pages of notes to study. It's really really cold outside and walking to class without a coat is impossible.
I baked a perfect cake, but I f-ed it up when I was frosting it. In other news, I finally got door handles put back on my car. It took me like a year and a half to get those fixed. I just want to sleep. A lot. I can't wait for Thanksgiving break!
It has been a crazy couple of weeks. One way to tell is to look at my room. If there are clothes everywhere, magazines scattered about, and a lot of shoes strewn about, it's a pretty safe bet that the week has been hell. I really need to find a hobby soon. I think I am going to lose my mind if I keep it up. I love what I do for work, but I need a break.
My family really needs prayer right now—my dad is having some serious health problems related to an on the job sort of injury. I'm really worried. Hopefully things will be alright in the end.
Mid-terms are over and I seem to still be passing all my classes nicely. The principles of advertising test didn't rape my too badly. I was really worried after I ended up having 12 pages of notes to study. It's really really cold outside and walking to class without a coat is impossible.
I baked a perfect cake, but I f-ed it up when I was frosting it. In other news, I finally got door handles put back on my car. It took me like a year and a half to get those fixed. I just want to sleep. A lot. I can't wait for Thanksgiving break!
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Inebriated? I think not...
About a month ago I was out late at night and decided I wanted an apple. I was down town and thought I would just drop by the ghetto Safeway and check out their fruit. Innocent enough, right?
I walked in, grabbed an apple, and bought it. I then got in my car and proceeded to drive home. The street I was driving on was not on my usual route home, and as I came to a stoplight, I realized I was in the left turn only lane. I wanted to go straight, so looking around as to make sure that no one was around, I pulled sharply into the adjoining through traffic lane. Mission accomplished.
As I advanced further on my journey home, I pulled into a left turn lane at a following stoplight. I put my blinker on, and when the light turned green I made a left turn. At which point red and blue lights flashed in my rear-view mirror.
The officer took his time in coming up to my window. In my mind I had done absolutely no wrong. He confronted me, and asked if I knew why he had pulled me over. I didn't. He then proceeded to tell me he had reason to believe from my driving that I was inebriated. Shocking. Luckily he didn't breathalyse me because he realized that I was indeed not driving under the influence. He couldn't find anything to give me a ticket for. I had handed him my license and registration the moment he had walked up but I couldn't find my insurance card for the life of me. He ended up giving me a ticket for not having my insurance. I was supposed to go and show my insurance at the municipal court and the fine would be rescinded.
I made several attempts to go to the court, but they were closed both times. Finally I made it in on a Friday within the 30 days of getting the fine. I thought I had 30 days, but it turns out I only had 15 to go in and show my insurance. The fine had doubled and was now $257. I almost choked... I really don't have that kind of money laying around... at least not for tickets. I talked to the judge and he said that all he could do was reduce my fine to $140. I paid my fine.
A couple days later I get a notice in the mail that my license is being suspended unless I prove I have purchased a certain kind of insurance. Turns out that because I'm a registered Oregon driver that I have to get "high risk" insurance because I am now a "high risk" driver. My insurance rate went up. I freaked out, but then I found out that it was just temporary. This was all very frustrating for me because I have a good driving record. I have never driven without insurance, never had a lapse in coverage. I've been insured with the same company for the entire time I've been driving. We have history...
... and all because I forgot to grab my insurance one night... and then I forgot to go show it to them within 15 days. It is irritating to be fined for doing absolutely nothing wrong. I can speed all I want, but if I'm ever doing something unintentionally wrong, I will pay the price for it. Just my luck. If anything, I will just drive more carefully. My bank account hurts. :)
I've been listening to Madonna's Confessions Tour album non-stop for the past two weeks... I need to move on. It is hot though. Just a heads up—it's addictive.
I walked in, grabbed an apple, and bought it. I then got in my car and proceeded to drive home. The street I was driving on was not on my usual route home, and as I came to a stoplight, I realized I was in the left turn only lane. I wanted to go straight, so looking around as to make sure that no one was around, I pulled sharply into the adjoining through traffic lane. Mission accomplished.
As I advanced further on my journey home, I pulled into a left turn lane at a following stoplight. I put my blinker on, and when the light turned green I made a left turn. At which point red and blue lights flashed in my rear-view mirror.
The officer took his time in coming up to my window. In my mind I had done absolutely no wrong. He confronted me, and asked if I knew why he had pulled me over. I didn't. He then proceeded to tell me he had reason to believe from my driving that I was inebriated. Shocking. Luckily he didn't breathalyse me because he realized that I was indeed not driving under the influence. He couldn't find anything to give me a ticket for. I had handed him my license and registration the moment he had walked up but I couldn't find my insurance card for the life of me. He ended up giving me a ticket for not having my insurance. I was supposed to go and show my insurance at the municipal court and the fine would be rescinded.
I made several attempts to go to the court, but they were closed both times. Finally I made it in on a Friday within the 30 days of getting the fine. I thought I had 30 days, but it turns out I only had 15 to go in and show my insurance. The fine had doubled and was now $257. I almost choked... I really don't have that kind of money laying around... at least not for tickets. I talked to the judge and he said that all he could do was reduce my fine to $140. I paid my fine.
A couple days later I get a notice in the mail that my license is being suspended unless I prove I have purchased a certain kind of insurance. Turns out that because I'm a registered Oregon driver that I have to get "high risk" insurance because I am now a "high risk" driver. My insurance rate went up. I freaked out, but then I found out that it was just temporary. This was all very frustrating for me because I have a good driving record. I have never driven without insurance, never had a lapse in coverage. I've been insured with the same company for the entire time I've been driving. We have history...
... and all because I forgot to grab my insurance one night... and then I forgot to go show it to them within 15 days. It is irritating to be fined for doing absolutely nothing wrong. I can speed all I want, but if I'm ever doing something unintentionally wrong, I will pay the price for it. Just my luck. If anything, I will just drive more carefully. My bank account hurts. :)
I've been listening to Madonna's Confessions Tour album non-stop for the past two weeks... I need to move on. It is hot though. Just a heads up—it's addictive.
Friday, October 5, 2007
I Heart Yard
School is fun. I'm currently in a very exclusive relationship... with my books. Hopefully this will pay off more than all the other romantic endeavors I've attempted in the past. I can tell we're meant to be. :D
It's cold outside. I bought a jacket for $70. Probably not worth it, but i was rather taken with it. It made me very happy when I put anything on with it. I love fall so much. I do enjoy the warmth of a summer's day, but I love love love a crisp fall day. To be able to put on a long-sleeved shirt, a jacket, and a scarf is pure bliss. The leaves are starting to fall slowly. Yesterday after I finished with all my classes and work I raked the leaves in my yard into unruly piles and attempted to dispose of them. Not so easy. Apparently they are really hard to get into bags. Who knew?
While out raking leaves and listening to my iPod, I contemplated how lucky I am to live in a house. Most people would consider it bothersome to be outside raking leaves or mowing the lawn. To be honest, I like it a lot. I almost find it a privilege rather than a chore. I've never lived in a house or had a yard until now. It's an adventure for me.
I am thinking of painting my room. I really want to paint it a very faint turquoise color. I am trying to weigh out whether or not it is worth it to paint my room, because I will have to paint it back to white when I move out. I'm hoping to stay here until I graduate. If I were to stay here, it would be worth it to paint, but if not, not so much. I'm in a crafty mood.
Today I opened a magazine and almost cried. I realize where I want to be, what I really love, and what I want to be doing career-wise. I forget how much I really love designing stuff and doing more creative work. I get buried under boring projects at work that take absolutely no thought or creativity to put together. Even if I did expend energy to improve the projects I'm given, my boss would still want the "ugly" version of what was requested. I almost forget that there are better things out there. I can't wait to get a job where I can do a little bit more than make forms all day. Then again, I suppose I still wouldn't be satisfied. That's okay. I have my whole life ahead of me to do amazing things!
It's cold outside. I bought a jacket for $70. Probably not worth it, but i was rather taken with it. It made me very happy when I put anything on with it. I love fall so much. I do enjoy the warmth of a summer's day, but I love love love a crisp fall day. To be able to put on a long-sleeved shirt, a jacket, and a scarf is pure bliss. The leaves are starting to fall slowly. Yesterday after I finished with all my classes and work I raked the leaves in my yard into unruly piles and attempted to dispose of them. Not so easy. Apparently they are really hard to get into bags. Who knew?
While out raking leaves and listening to my iPod, I contemplated how lucky I am to live in a house. Most people would consider it bothersome to be outside raking leaves or mowing the lawn. To be honest, I like it a lot. I almost find it a privilege rather than a chore. I've never lived in a house or had a yard until now. It's an adventure for me.
I am thinking of painting my room. I really want to paint it a very faint turquoise color. I am trying to weigh out whether or not it is worth it to paint my room, because I will have to paint it back to white when I move out. I'm hoping to stay here until I graduate. If I were to stay here, it would be worth it to paint, but if not, not so much. I'm in a crafty mood.
Today I opened a magazine and almost cried. I realize where I want to be, what I really love, and what I want to be doing career-wise. I forget how much I really love designing stuff and doing more creative work. I get buried under boring projects at work that take absolutely no thought or creativity to put together. Even if I did expend energy to improve the projects I'm given, my boss would still want the "ugly" version of what was requested. I almost forget that there are better things out there. I can't wait to get a job where I can do a little bit more than make forms all day. Then again, I suppose I still wouldn't be satisfied. That's okay. I have my whole life ahead of me to do amazing things!
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