A wise friend once gave me a book (The Scripture of the Golden Eternity by Jack Kerouac) that I had until now set aside. Feeling blue from winter weather and pathetic, self-pitying life circumstances, I picked it up and really read it for the first time. This friend of mine penned a note in the cover, it reads:
08-14-2006
Heather,
As part of the obligatory process of growing older/you're an adult now, I give to you the sage advice and wisdom of Jack Kerouac. This is your roadmap to the future. "Roaring dreams take place in a perfectly silent mind." Lie down, rest. I <3 you forever.
After reading this, I immediately felt more at peace. Life has been pretty eventful for me in the past few months and I'm just trying to settle down. I read part of the book today and felt more at peace than I have in ages. I think this is a good path.
Thanks Nan.
I've been listening to Band of Horses again, and really enjoying an array of older Modest Mouse. Broken Social Scene is coming to Portland... anyone want to go???
Monday, January 5, 2009
Thursday, December 11, 2008
The Processional
I started keeping a design process blog for a class and I am going to try to keep it updated with my latest thoughts and work. It isn't that amazing at this point, but hopefully it will be in the future. The following is from my thoughts for an essay that was written. I just thought it was relavent to today and everyone should know about what is going on in the world and how they can help.
Art Final Essay Thoughts:
In choosing to pursue a career that has so much to do with aesthetics, and the idea that things that are pleasing to the eye are expensive, it is hard to feel like you, as a deisgner, are doing something for the greater good. Making things in this world look beautiful and sell well, and executing brilliant advetising campaigns aren't always enough at the end of the day. I personally struggle with feeling a lack of purpose and connection to the greater population of the world. In lecture, Luke Bertus spoke of how we design for only a small percentage of the world's population. What about everyone else?
When I was still mulling this subject over and contemplating this paper in my head, I happened to watch a man (on tv) from a small rural village of China get a partial face transplant. As I watched his long journey from the mountains in China all the way to Beijing, I realized just how big of a world it is out there, how fortunate I am that I don't have to herd cattle in a remote forest and worry about a bear slashing half of my face off. I realized how convenient my life is here, I have nothing to be worrying about.
My thoughts then turned to everyone else in the world and how I could help them. Being a poor (in American standards) student attempting to become a designer, how can I make a difference? Sometimes I want to drop everything, school, work, friends and family and go to some remote corner of the Earth and just help people. Every time I verbalize these thoughts to my friends or family, they recoil and say I should finish school first. Sure, school will give me a degree and supposedly a job... but is that what is needed in this life? I feel I should just worry about the things in life that matter, like the basic needs and lives of others. Then again, making money and having a home is nice I guess.
When I was looking at different projects, I started reading more about what a studio called Work Worth Doing, is in fact, doing. I found their idea of "Shipping Greenland's water to Africa" quite enlightening. The pictures showed a well designed approach to communicating their ideas. The large installation of a physical representation of greenland's receding ice and melting run-off was really interesting to look at and gave viewers a figure to identify with. It also just looked really cool.
The graphic representations were simple and clear, easy to understand. The project was presented in step-by-step form, steps 1 through 9. The problems of both Greenland and Africa were presented and then a solution was suggested that could perhaps help both. All of this was presented in 2004 in Toronto, Denmark, and Venice as part of the 'Too Perfect' project of the Danish Architecture Centre of Copenhagen, Denmark.
The project is presented with the thought in mind that the world's purest water is exported and sold all over to those with the money to buy it. Since when did water become a luxury? It is not fair that only those with money be able to purchase a resource that is necessary for human survival. So many die every day from lack of clean water and stupid consumers are buying all of this bottled water. The American people should just drink our tap water, it is a luxury. If Americans hate how their tap water tastes, they should consider purchasing a water filter instead of spending so much money on bottled water. I'm not even going to start talking about all of the waste that is created as a result of the bottling and shipping of this luxury; bottled water.
I want to become more involved in public awareness, because that is where graphic designers can contribute most towards global causes. We are taught how to reach people, how our brains react to images, colors, and shapes. We are sitting on a goldmine of sorts. Here we sit, atop a mound of knowledge, perfectly able to help so many causes around us, and yet we still sit. We worry about money, getting recognition, doing what we want, when we could be doing so much to help. My question is how do I get involved, being so busy as a student. I need to just take the time to find a cause and do what little I can in my free time to support it. Each of us were given a talent, and if we don't use it, I have a feeling we will eventually lose it. Whether you believe in God(s), or yourself, or in just nothing, this principal is true. Use it or lose it.
If you want more information about this project, or other projects that Work Worth Doing is working on, visit their webpage.
Art Final Essay Thoughts:
In choosing to pursue a career that has so much to do with aesthetics, and the idea that things that are pleasing to the eye are expensive, it is hard to feel like you, as a deisgner, are doing something for the greater good. Making things in this world look beautiful and sell well, and executing brilliant advetising campaigns aren't always enough at the end of the day. I personally struggle with feeling a lack of purpose and connection to the greater population of the world. In lecture, Luke Bertus spoke of how we design for only a small percentage of the world's population. What about everyone else?
When I was still mulling this subject over and contemplating this paper in my head, I happened to watch a man (on tv) from a small rural village of China get a partial face transplant. As I watched his long journey from the mountains in China all the way to Beijing, I realized just how big of a world it is out there, how fortunate I am that I don't have to herd cattle in a remote forest and worry about a bear slashing half of my face off. I realized how convenient my life is here, I have nothing to be worrying about.
My thoughts then turned to everyone else in the world and how I could help them. Being a poor (in American standards) student attempting to become a designer, how can I make a difference? Sometimes I want to drop everything, school, work, friends and family and go to some remote corner of the Earth and just help people. Every time I verbalize these thoughts to my friends or family, they recoil and say I should finish school first. Sure, school will give me a degree and supposedly a job... but is that what is needed in this life? I feel I should just worry about the things in life that matter, like the basic needs and lives of others. Then again, making money and having a home is nice I guess.
When I was looking at different projects, I started reading more about what a studio called Work Worth Doing, is in fact, doing. I found their idea of "Shipping Greenland's water to Africa" quite enlightening. The pictures showed a well designed approach to communicating their ideas. The large installation of a physical representation of greenland's receding ice and melting run-off was really interesting to look at and gave viewers a figure to identify with. It also just looked really cool.
The graphic representations were simple and clear, easy to understand. The project was presented in step-by-step form, steps 1 through 9. The problems of both Greenland and Africa were presented and then a solution was suggested that could perhaps help both. All of this was presented in 2004 in Toronto, Denmark, and Venice as part of the 'Too Perfect' project of the Danish Architecture Centre of Copenhagen, Denmark.
The project is presented with the thought in mind that the world's purest water is exported and sold all over to those with the money to buy it. Since when did water become a luxury? It is not fair that only those with money be able to purchase a resource that is necessary for human survival. So many die every day from lack of clean water and stupid consumers are buying all of this bottled water. The American people should just drink our tap water, it is a luxury. If Americans hate how their tap water tastes, they should consider purchasing a water filter instead of spending so much money on bottled water. I'm not even going to start talking about all of the waste that is created as a result of the bottling and shipping of this luxury; bottled water.
I want to become more involved in public awareness, because that is where graphic designers can contribute most towards global causes. We are taught how to reach people, how our brains react to images, colors, and shapes. We are sitting on a goldmine of sorts. Here we sit, atop a mound of knowledge, perfectly able to help so many causes around us, and yet we still sit. We worry about money, getting recognition, doing what we want, when we could be doing so much to help. My question is how do I get involved, being so busy as a student. I need to just take the time to find a cause and do what little I can in my free time to support it. Each of us were given a talent, and if we don't use it, I have a feeling we will eventually lose it. Whether you believe in God(s), or yourself, or in just nothing, this principal is true. Use it or lose it.
If you want more information about this project, or other projects that Work Worth Doing is working on, visit their webpage.
An Update
Hi guys! Long time no post...
Lots of things have changed. I moved, I lived in a house with six other people in far out East Portland. I met two people in the house that I love to death, one of which I just moved with to an apartment a mile from downtown on the east side. We just moved in last night. I will spare you the details of the departure from our previous dissatisfactory living arrangement and just tell you that even though we've been in our new place for 72 hours, we are much much happier here.
My new roommate's name is Danielle, she is from Illinois and she moved to Portland last June. She is really fun and sweet, she loves movies and just hanging out. She tolerates and usually enjoys my taste in music, which is important as many of you may know.
I just finished my first quarter at Portland State University (which will from now on be refferred to as PSU). It was a hard quarter, trying to adjust to a new school, all my homework, and working full time. Now that we are settled in a better place, this next quarter should be really great. I am hopefull. Not much else in the way of news. Oh, my computer died, so that is why I never post anymore. That will hopefully be changing soon.
Lots of things have changed. I moved, I lived in a house with six other people in far out East Portland. I met two people in the house that I love to death, one of which I just moved with to an apartment a mile from downtown on the east side. We just moved in last night. I will spare you the details of the departure from our previous dissatisfactory living arrangement and just tell you that even though we've been in our new place for 72 hours, we are much much happier here.
My new roommate's name is Danielle, she is from Illinois and she moved to Portland last June. She is really fun and sweet, she loves movies and just hanging out. She tolerates and usually enjoys my taste in music, which is important as many of you may know.
I just finished my first quarter at Portland State University (which will from now on be refferred to as PSU). It was a hard quarter, trying to adjust to a new school, all my homework, and working full time. Now that we are settled in a better place, this next quarter should be really great. I am hopefull. Not much else in the way of news. Oh, my computer died, so that is why I never post anymore. That will hopefully be changing soon.
Friday, August 22, 2008
Eight Bags
Out for coffee, feeling alone. Skinny Love comes on, loud and clear. Feeling even more alone than before. I start to hum along, like I do to every other song because I don't know all the words. I hear someone else singing. I look up and see the man I always see when I am here. He wears the same grey Hanes sweatshirt and dark grey jogging pants every time I see him. Irony. He is reading the "How We Live" section in the Oregonian. He carries exactly eight paper shopping bags covered with plastic shopping bags from Fred Meyer, four in each hand. Everything he owns is in those eight bags. I see him every day. We exchange polite smiles and he acknowledges my existence over his taped glasses, one lens replaced with a brown cardboard cutout. He knows all the words to all the songs. I wonder about him. Who he is behind his mid-size beard and how he knows all the words to one of my favourite songs. He doesn't seem like the typical Bon Iver loving kind. Before I got the chance to post this or further analyze this gentleman, my friend Amy and her brother came and met up with me. As we left I glanced at the man and said a polite goodbye with my eyes and a slight smile.
We were going to Portland City Fest—a christian event held on the waterfront to convert all of Portland—to hear Kutless and Chris Tomlin play. After weaving through the masses to find a place where we could stand comfortably and see the stage, Luis Palau started preaching. When I am at the conversion festivals, I always feel so confused about my faith. I am not like those around me, I've heard the message of Christ. I know what I believe, but still I never raise my hands or pray the prayers that the man on stage tells me to pray. I feel I have a rebellious nature. I will pray on my own. I don't need to raise my hands in a crowd to prove my allegiance to Christ. I like small gatherings. I hate big church. I feel such an aversion to large gatherings. Why is this?
I was at an adventist church recently, and we were studying somewhere in the Gospels where the latter rain or the holy spirit will come down on the masses or something like that. One person said that they didn't feel like they could share Christ with others, that they wouldn't until the "latter rain" came down. Others agreed. We sat in a small circle just nodding and talking about it like we were so removed and we couldn't do anything until the holy sprit rained. I felt defiant. Annoyed. Why have we become so stagnant? Who needs to sit around and wait for some outpouring? You can ask. You can go serve. You don't need to preach. Live your life in a way that tells others about Christ. I am feeling very done with the Adventist Church, or any church for that matter. Church makes people sit back and not strive anymore. Laziness.
Every so often I find that I am not where I need to be spiritually. I will never be. There is no such thing as once saved, always saved. It is a continual struggle in my daily life. I feel like it is personal, and shouldn't be dealt with in crowds of thousands at a Praise Fest or anything. I want to join some church, but at the same time I think that I will lose my edge, become lazy, turn into my parents when it comes to being spiritual. I don't want the cookie cutter relationship with my creator. I long for something more. I feel like there is more and I'm just not seeking hard enough. Anyone with me?
Music:
Anything Radiohead, especially depressing songs, heartbreak.
Newer Cold War Kids, MGMT. I <3 MGMT!!!! Seriously.
Also, I was skeptical about Vampire Weekend but I am coming around.
Really enjoying Yeasayer as well.
And Britney Spears... (slightly embarrassed)
Saturday, August 2, 2008
Things Took a Turn
Life has been good. Tonight, things took a turn for the worse. I lost a dear friend of mine. My macbook's LCD screen has had a tragic accident. I wont point fingers, but I am ultimately to blame. By placing it on the floor to avoid direct sunlight, I left it wide open for damage from the tracks under my passenger seat. Normally, nobody rides with me in my car and I didn't think anything of it.
I will never forget this night. I'm afraid that life as I know it is over. I'm in mourning. I'll be wearing black for the next week. In fact, I'm wearing black as we speak. I feel like I've lost a part of myself.
I will never forget this night. I'm afraid that life as I know it is over. I'm in mourning. I'll be wearing black for the next week. In fact, I'm wearing black as we speak. I feel like I've lost a part of myself.
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
The Pearl
I've successfully made my move to the Portland metro area. I live between Hillsboro and Beaverton, over a hill in the country. It is peaceful, gorgeous, trees and birds, and we have a pet cat. I love him a lot. His name is Boots but I call him Bootsie. He is a bobcat but he is grey and has a little white on his chest. He sleeps on top of the washer and dryer on one of Grandpa's (Alexa's grandfather) old sweaters. Every time I go through the washroom to the garage to go out, I always stop and pet him. He is really friendly and likes to be brushed with his cat brush. I have to be careful or he will get cat hair all over me.
Grandma Gladys died about a year ago and I had to go through my room and take some of her stuff down to the basement. She had been an Avon lady since the late 60's and had tons of cool costume jewelry. I cleaned out drawers full of random necklaces, bracelets, and really cool rings. There were cabinets full of old perfume, bath oils, skin care and men's cologne. The packaging was all so interesting to look at and so stylish. It is funny how packaging changes through the years.
I've spent the last couple of weeks looking for a job and exploring Portland. I'm happy to say I have a decent sense of direction and where everything is at now, and I don't get lost anymore. Lex has class at PSU in the morning so I have been riding the Max downtown with her. While she is in class, I go explore downtown. I usually end up in the Pearl District. It is one of my favourite places to be. Everything here is to my liking. I just come down here and find a coffee shop and internet. There are so many cool boutiques and restaurants. I really like going to this place called Sippen Krantz. It is a coffee bar and it is really nicely designed. The coffee is also great, and the people are friendly. My kind of place. There is cool lighting, as you can see below... and my hair is kind of wild... I've discovered that no one really minds that here. I am really loving it here.
Besides exploring, I have been looking for work. I applied at a million different places, but I ended up getting a job working at Noah's Bagels yesterday. I'm going to be a little shift manager, so I get paid more. After my training I will get even more, so that is nice. Also I get to wear jeans to work every day, I get free espresso, bagels, and I will never work past 5:30 pm. I'm really glad, because there are a lot of cool things that go on in Portland at night. I wouldn't want to get stuck working and have to miss out on a social life, or more importantly, amazing concerts. It is a blessing. I was really down the day before yesterday, I didn't think I would get a job. I prayed about it, I really wanted a couple of the other jobs I had applied for but it had been a week and a half and I hadn't heard anything. I applied at the last minute that night for Noah's, and then I got a call at 8 am about it. I figured I'd go. In the car driving there I was thinking to myself and God, I need a job, and if this is the right one for me right now, impress me in that direction. If not, and there is something else He has planned for me now, help me see that this job isn't for me. Well, turns out it is for me, so I took it. I will probably keep it for a year while I go to school and until I find a good starting place more in my line of work. I'm really thankful though.
Grandma Gladys died about a year ago and I had to go through my room and take some of her stuff down to the basement. She had been an Avon lady since the late 60's and had tons of cool costume jewelry. I cleaned out drawers full of random necklaces, bracelets, and really cool rings. There were cabinets full of old perfume, bath oils, skin care and men's cologne. The packaging was all so interesting to look at and so stylish. It is funny how packaging changes through the years.
I've spent the last couple of weeks looking for a job and exploring Portland. I'm happy to say I have a decent sense of direction and where everything is at now, and I don't get lost anymore. Lex has class at PSU in the morning so I have been riding the Max downtown with her. While she is in class, I go explore downtown. I usually end up in the Pearl District. It is one of my favourite places to be. Everything here is to my liking. I just come down here and find a coffee shop and internet. There are so many cool boutiques and restaurants. I really like going to this place called Sippen Krantz. It is a coffee bar and it is really nicely designed. The coffee is also great, and the people are friendly. My kind of place. There is cool lighting, as you can see below... and my hair is kind of wild... I've discovered that no one really minds that here. I am really loving it here.
Besides exploring, I have been looking for work. I applied at a million different places, but I ended up getting a job working at Noah's Bagels yesterday. I'm going to be a little shift manager, so I get paid more. After my training I will get even more, so that is nice. Also I get to wear jeans to work every day, I get free espresso, bagels, and I will never work past 5:30 pm. I'm really glad, because there are a lot of cool things that go on in Portland at night. I wouldn't want to get stuck working and have to miss out on a social life, or more importantly, amazing concerts. It is a blessing. I was really down the day before yesterday, I didn't think I would get a job. I prayed about it, I really wanted a couple of the other jobs I had applied for but it had been a week and a half and I hadn't heard anything. I applied at the last minute that night for Noah's, and then I got a call at 8 am about it. I figured I'd go. In the car driving there I was thinking to myself and God, I need a job, and if this is the right one for me right now, impress me in that direction. If not, and there is something else He has planned for me now, help me see that this job isn't for me. Well, turns out it is for me, so I took it. I will probably keep it for a year while I go to school and until I find a good starting place more in my line of work. I'm really thankful though.
Sunday, June 15, 2008
I'm Packing
It's been a while... I've been busy. I'm just packing up my life here in Walla Walla, and getting ready to move out and clean my house tomorrow. I hate packing... but I love the things I find and the memories that go with them.
White vintage clutch - I lost it a couple weeks ago going out one night in the heat of dead week. I found it in my room in a green plastic bag with half a cookie and a copy of Dwell, sitting under my Ikea table. A friend and I went out to grab coffee and read magazines at Starbucks. They closed, and then I had to go to the bathroom. So I went to Coffee Perk next door, thinking that I would just sneak in and use their bathroom. No such luck. The bathroom was closed and I got guilted into buying a cookie, which I threw in a bag, with my wallet and Dwell, and forgot about. I've been looking for my wallet for like 2 weeks now. I'm really glad I found it.
Bubble Wrap – I was emptying out a Crate and Barrel box that my friends' wedding gift came in when I came across some bubble wrap. I tossed it in the trash, but then decided to keep it for packing. I remembered how excited I was at their wedding and how fun it was to shop for their present.
A Birthday Card – In the miscellaneous drawer (Everyone, no matter how neat, has to have one of these. It contains just the stuff that you can't bring yourself to toss because it has a shred of sentimental value... or you just don't have a category for it) I came across a card from all of my friends for my birthday last year. That birthday was by far the best I have ever had. My friends threw me a surprise garden party for my birthday. Everyone was wearing white except for me, and we played bocce ball and croquet (which Jessica and I cheated at when no one was looking). That was the only party I have ever really had, aside from the one with the neighbor kids when I was 4. It meant a lot to me, and the card has little notes from everyone in it. It is one card I will probably keep for a long time. I am so thankful for the friendships I have had while being here.
Starbucks gift card – While clearing my desk to disassemble it, I came across a gift card. I tossed it in the trash but then I couldn't remember if I had emptied it or not so I went to Starbucks with Phil. It actually had $20, untouched on it. Pleasant surprise.
I went to graduation this morning and both of my roommates graduated. Our house was full of family, and our house isn't that big to start with... When we got back from graduation, the front yard had about twenty people milling around and two grills were fired up. Lunch was great and it was good to see everyone that was visiting for the weekend. Good times.
White vintage clutch - I lost it a couple weeks ago going out one night in the heat of dead week. I found it in my room in a green plastic bag with half a cookie and a copy of Dwell, sitting under my Ikea table. A friend and I went out to grab coffee and read magazines at Starbucks. They closed, and then I had to go to the bathroom. So I went to Coffee Perk next door, thinking that I would just sneak in and use their bathroom. No such luck. The bathroom was closed and I got guilted into buying a cookie, which I threw in a bag, with my wallet and Dwell, and forgot about. I've been looking for my wallet for like 2 weeks now. I'm really glad I found it.
Bubble Wrap – I was emptying out a Crate and Barrel box that my friends' wedding gift came in when I came across some bubble wrap. I tossed it in the trash, but then decided to keep it for packing. I remembered how excited I was at their wedding and how fun it was to shop for their present.
A Birthday Card – In the miscellaneous drawer (Everyone, no matter how neat, has to have one of these. It contains just the stuff that you can't bring yourself to toss because it has a shred of sentimental value... or you just don't have a category for it) I came across a card from all of my friends for my birthday last year. That birthday was by far the best I have ever had. My friends threw me a surprise garden party for my birthday. Everyone was wearing white except for me, and we played bocce ball and croquet (which Jessica and I cheated at when no one was looking). That was the only party I have ever really had, aside from the one with the neighbor kids when I was 4. It meant a lot to me, and the card has little notes from everyone in it. It is one card I will probably keep for a long time. I am so thankful for the friendships I have had while being here.
Starbucks gift card – While clearing my desk to disassemble it, I came across a gift card. I tossed it in the trash but then I couldn't remember if I had emptied it or not so I went to Starbucks with Phil. It actually had $20, untouched on it. Pleasant surprise.
I went to graduation this morning and both of my roommates graduated. Our house was full of family, and our house isn't that big to start with... When we got back from graduation, the front yard had about twenty people milling around and two grills were fired up. Lunch was great and it was good to see everyone that was visiting for the weekend. Good times.
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